Saturday, July 07, 2007

A Picture Of My Cock

To the person looking for 'Female Tortre Devices' (sic), might I suggest you seek some help?

The amount of badly spelt search engine requests for porn that are landing in my tracker has to be seen to be believed. Is it the same person? If so, what makes them think that after their first visit to my blog, there will subsequently be anything in the way of suitable wanking material? Isn't this what Pornotube was invented for..................


What is it with 'hyper' people? You know, folk that are always jolly and want to know why you aren't jumping through yr own arsehole with joy every time you see them? Picture the scene. You've just come into the office at lunchtime, when some planet sized moron you barely know stops you in yr tracks and asks why you didn't say hello to her and her cohorts in the street.

It may be that I'm incredibly rude in that I don't Merrily greet everyone that works in my office as I walk to the shops at lunch time. If I'd fucking known people were that sensitive I'd have tried harder...................Funny really, it looked like she'd latched herself onto a couple of girls sitting near her and was in the process of subjecting them to her 'vivacious personality' as they ate their lunch and checked their bebo.

If she wants the money for her sponsored waddle she's gonna have to try a lot fucking harder than that...................

Youtube.....................

10 comments:

Lord Milky said...

YouPorn is better than Pornotube I find...

Bock the Robber said...

Well done. Vivacious people are a pain in the arse.

Fat Sparrow said...

"The amount of badly spelt search engine requests for porn that are landing in my tracker has to be seen to be believed."

I get people searching for "pron." Whether they mean "porn" or whether they mean "prawn," I don't know, but I find the whole thing to be disturbing.

iLL Man said...

Milky - I have to agree

Bock - I know, why can't everyone be a bunch of maladjusted cunts like us?

Fat Sparra - I believe it's a deliberate thing. Anyone who calls it 'pron' is complete dicksplash.

Clairwil said...

Ill man,
Sorry to go off topic but can I refer you to my most recent post. Oh ye of little faith.

Lorna said...

I almost wish I got badly spelled porn searches: I only get people searching for me (Lorna librarian Cambridge, that sort of thing). I may have to start posting suggestively-titled photos to throw the librarian obsessives of the scent...

I did get one for 'Bill Bailey pringle sandwich' once, but somehow I don't think that counts as smutty, except in very very specific circumstances...

Clairwil said...

May I also refer you to this

http://scottishidlersguild.wordpress.com/

It needs pictures and stories.

iLL Man said...

Clairwil - See my comment on yr blog. Most enjoyable....=D

Lorna - That means you have groupies. Rejoice!!

Clairwil (you again??) - Brilliant. How do I contribute? Will I need a Wordpress account?

Graeme said...

Nice Codeine video!

iLL Man said...

Cheers Graeme. Alas, it's the only one I can find on Youtube.