Thursday, September 04, 2008

Calling All Armchair Despots!

When you do what I do for a living, the mind tends to wander off in search of improved mental stimulation. Of course, this generally involves internet abuse, scribbling out food shopping lists and doodling on notepads. Today however, I got to thinking about what might happen if we were to declare our own countries.
Think of the little part of the world you live in and imagine what you would do with it if it were to gain independence. My thoughts on the subject are as follows..............
The state would be named 'The Peoples Republic of Maryhill'. Initially I would run the state from the burnt out ruins of the Community Central Halls, as a symbolic gesture, before re-locating to the rather comfier local housing association offices until the mess made by my bloody coup was cleared up. I would then elect a polit-bureau consisting entirely of family members, friends and whatever local mental cases join my cause. The economy would be based on three nationalised industries. Fast food, off licenses and a scratch card lottery with bogus prizes. Plans to invade Springburn, Hillhead and Possilpark would be formulated in due course.
Sounds like paradise!
Ok, your turn now. I need some allies........................ ;)

10 comments:

dearieme said...

The East Angular Light Horse would crest the Chilterns and fall upon London, to bring the smack of firm government to that benighted outpost of the Third World.

SzélsőFa said...

If I were to overtake my country I would wipe out all the administrative stuff. And the Parliament.
And everyone wishing bad fate to the country. Or something like that.
Also, I would make organic production the only way of farming.

La Bête said...

If I were King of the People's Republic of Peckham, well, it would no longer be a republic. So I'd best be some kind of Supreme Ruler instead. And yes, my first thoughts tend toward invasion. You'd have to, wouldn't you? The temptation would just be too strong. So yes, I would amass an army of shopkeepers and God-botherers and invade East Dulwich. I wouldn't be surprised if there were some pillaging too. You see how power corrupts? What have you turned me into? I've become everything I despise. Damn you!

iLL Man said...

dm - I'd see about upping the dosage and buying a tinfoil helmet off David Duff if I were you........... ;)

Szelsofa - Interesting. Sort of like anarcho-syndicalism? Or have I got it wrong?

La Bête - I wouldn't worry about it. What's the point of power unless you get to abuse it?

SzélsőFa said...

I'm unsure of the exact definiton, but I'm thinking of small, local communities, local initiatives.

dearieme said...

I used to enjoy Duff, illman, but then he changed his font so that I can't read his site.

Planet Mondo said...

Funnily enough - I did a post about what the rules and reg's would be if I was in charge - you can read about it here - along with the anthems to match.

iLL Man said...

dm - My enjoyment of the Duff could only be enhanced by not being able to read his meandering piffle.

PM - I'll be over in a minute to see if we can form an alliance of some sort..............

meekon5 said...

I already am the God Despot of the Castle of Sunflowers, Pope Simon the first. Why would I want to be involved in “imaginings”?

iLL Man said...

Good for you!!