Friday, October 27, 2006

Shingles Is So Last Wednesday Afternoon..............

I've actually been malingering my way towards a return to work for about three days now..... A week and a half of hot water bottles, waking up feeling like i'd been set on fire and trying not to look at the scaley rash that appeared on my abdomen................ Of course, now there isn't a dvd in my collection I haven't watched. Twice. I did buy factotum (good, but the book's better) and I found Bubba Ho-Tep (genius), but theres only so many times you can watch Vic & Bob or Futurama before you lose the will to live. The pox that is daytime tv also did it's best to send me insane. If I was in charge of daytime tv, i'd simply show back to back Columbo's or Rockford Files, maybe some brilliant old movies like Grand Prix, Some Like It Hot, Kind Hearts & Coronets, The Dambusters etc, topped off with old Top Of The Pops re-runs. The day I decide I want to watch people clear out the worthless tat from their loft and sell it at a carboot sale is the day I find a sharp stick and gouge my eyes out. Or at least get someone to do it for me. Fuckers!!! I've also become something of an officianado of the hot water bottle. I started the week with one which was losing it's inside lining every time I emptied it. I now have three of the buggers. One of them is a strange fabric covered gel pack that you put in the microwave. Most convenient. Also mildly disturbing. Next week I shall bring you a consumer report on fluffy slippers and an 'Ovaltine vs Horlicks Hot Bedtime Beverage Road Test'. The way I see it, I'm just getting the practice in for when I become an old cunt.

11 comments:

Old Knudsen said...

You had better get it right when you're an old cunt, no room for mistakes, practice practice.

Anonymous said...

Horlicks all the way.

Clairwil said...

Pah! Daytime telly rocks. The Wright Stuff, Trisha and The Jeremy Kyle show are all wonderful.

Though a bit more Colombo wouldn't go amiss

Clairwil said...

Illman,
Why is blogger tormenting me?

margin walker said...

Quincy is a fav..

I remember the days when BBC just put Ceefax on all day...

ill man said...

Old Knudsen, i've been perfecting the art for some years now.

Sandra, i'm more of a Camomile tea type to be honest.

Clairwil, I tried watching The Wright Stuff. Needless to say I wanted to punch someone immediately afterwards. It's better than Trisha or Jeremy Kyle though. As for Blogger..............words fail me. I see you have two identical posts up just now. What's that all about?

Stephen, Quincy always annoyed me. So earnest......Always a bloody moral to the story etc....

Clairwil said...

Fuck knows what Blogger is doing. Though the problem seems to be rectified. For now......

Podomatic is tormenting me instead.

Technology is a wanker.

Clairwil said...

OOOOH while I remember Charlie Brooker is on Have I Got News For You this week.

ill man said...

This week coming? Nice!

Babsbitchin said...

Damn those Shingles. It's just not funny. Cheer up,hope you feel better!

Billy said...

Whenever I watch Quincy I always ponder how long it's going to be before he starts yelling about it being murder. Not long usually.