Friday, October 12, 2007

Picking At The Edges Until They Fray A Bit


Due to being unable to blog with much frequency, I've been reduced to doing a sort of round-up of stuff that's taken my interest. Very dull and a bit 'rote', but until I get my arse in gear, it's all you'll get.

First up, I found this awe-inspiring message board. Let loose on the object of your loathing in the workplace and have readers rate your rage. Please visit the rest of the site too. My favourite was the chap whose wife "looks like Lorraine Kelly, but ten years younger"

Beautiful!

Next up Kelvin McKenzie. Ok, who's first to kick the fat faced cunt in the arse? I must say, rising to the bait is never a good idea, as the outraged complaints to the BBC illustrate. People were falling over themselves to call him a nasty racist so & so without realising that the words dribbling from pudgy lips are the utterings of a total simpleton, and the alleged racism was probably the least risible thing to emanate from him (I found him quite amusing in a 'panto villain' kind of way). Kelvin, poor soul that he is, still thinks the streets of London are lined with gold and that on every corner there lurk a dozen wide-boys and spivs, just waiting to turn a buck and rocket the economy into the stratosphere.

Mr McKenzie reckons we 'sweaty socks' just aren't 'entrepreneurial enough'. If you say so Kelvin. I wouldn't know of course, having spent the past thirty years suckling on the teat of the state and piggy-backing off hard working 'Del Boys' and used car salesmen in the south of England with my miserable tax paying existence. Oh yes..........

In his mind it's still 1987, and maybe it always will be.

Finally, a requiem for Berti. Whatever you say about Berti Vogts, he did one thing that neither of his successors would have had the stomach to do had they become national coach after Craig Browns departure. He put youth first, he gave young, talented Scots footballers a chance in the national side and encouraged the development of youth already underway at club level. Unfortunately, he got enough wrong to justify his eventual sacking (too many friendlies, not a great tactician, especially with relatively limited talent, maybe a wee language barrier, especially with the more bullish elements of the Scottish sporting press corps and wee fuds like Barry Ferguson).

According to this wonderful piece of populist revisionism, Berti left the national side (and by implication the game itself) at it's lowest ebb. Scottish footballs lowest ebb was actually prior to the entry of herr Vogts, not after it. I mean, the fact that Scotland almost made it to the 2004 Euro Championships under Vogts, only bowing out in a play off against the Dutch (another example of received history for another day) has nothing to do with anything, and you'd be a liar and an SFA lackey if you were to suggest otherwise.

Alas, it was beyond Vogts to build on this, but what he bequeathed to Walter Smith was the basis of the team that seems to be firing on all cylinders (touch wood) at this moment in time. What Alex Mcleish inherited from Smith when he smelled the prospect of a return to Rangers was phase two of the rebuild. If this is a work in progress, then I have no worries for the future.

Phase three begins after the next Euro championships, regardless of whether Scotland qualify or not.............

Ok. Zep time. This is for Flying Rodent





Ok, so the sound is horrible and the audience look Keith Moon's got to them with the elephant tranks, but it does rock like nobodies business.

10 comments:

The Birdwatcher said...

Kelvin Fucking McKenzie! Just goes to show what a sad state the education system must have been in when that little twat went to school. I mean for fucks sake has he never heard of Adam Smith? Even the socialist Gordon Brown has heard of Adam Smith.Your right he is not a racist, just a very ignorant little man. Christ what does he read the Sun?

FlyingRodent said...

Whoah, have I even mentioned my Zep-love in print, or was it just an educated guess?

Not to bring up bad memories, but...

Regarding Berti, one moment will always stick in my mind - we'd taken a three-nil tonking off some abject amateurs, and Chick Young asked him So, what went wrong?

I don't know, Berti said.

That rather sealed his fate for me - that was the game where Christian Dailly famously stormed over to the bench and said, If you won't fix it, I will.

Alledgedly, i.e. according to Chico.

Point is, if the manager doesn't know what went wrong, who does?

Nonetheless, I'm behind Scotland all the way tomorrow. A win over the Ukraine would be a fantastic result, given the team they have.

Come on, we're almost there!

FlyingRodent said...

P.S. I penned a horrible tract on Thursday night about Kelvin MacKenzie, filled with cusswords so vitriolic they would make your eyes bleed.

I didn't publish it - I figured the yanks, the English and the Kiwis wouldn't get it...

iLL Man said...

Birdwatcher - Gordon Brown a socialist? Depends on what your definition of one is............

FR - You mentioned your love of Zep in the comments box of a post I made some time back. Quite vociferously actually..........

I take your point about BV. I did say he lacked certain things needed to take Scotland forward. I saw him as a coach, not a manager. That said, he wasn't that bad and I maintain he left a decent foundation for Smith and McLeish to build on. If Berti left the Scotland setup in a mess, then that would make Walter Smith a genius. Which he's not.

Regarding Kelvin McKenzie........'Twat' isn't a big enough word for him. I still found the whole thing quite amusing though. Maybe it's just that the Scots have forgotten what it's like to be loathed simply for being Scottish.

FlyingRodent said...

Ewan, the SFA told Berti in no uncertain terms that they'd pay him a vast wage, provided he blooded a new generation of Scottish players.

I hate to be so cynical, but it was SFA policy, not Berti's...

Otherwise, what a game today - I've been gnawing my fingers to the bone all week.

There's a nasty slur going about that Old Firm fans don't care about the national team, but I want to be the one who pops that bubble.

If somebody offered me Scotland to squeak a 1-0 in Georgia on Wednesday while Celtic get stuffed 4-0 at Ibrox next week, I'd bite your hand off.

Cheers for the Zep, by the way. My favourite Youtube clip is "Dazed and Confused" in front of a baffled audience of Dutch teenagers...

iLL Man said...

Fair point FR. Maybe I'm giving the wee man more credit than he deserves. I still maintain Vogts wasn't the horrific disaster many people paint him to be, but it's easy to say considering our current successes.

Next week I'll attempt to argue that Hitler was a good egg really and Pol Pot was a prince amongst men.

As for OF fans, I don't tend to regard them as any more or less 'patriotic' than anyone else. I know many who support Scotland and none who don't. You get some Celtic fans who support the Republic, and I'm sure there are equally perverse Rangers fans out there. 'Tis the way of the world.

Led Zep had a thing for performing in front of bemused foreign audiences. The Youtube clip I posted was shot in Paris

Clairwil said...

'As for OF fans, I don't tend to regard them as any more or less 'patriotic' than anyone else. I know many who support Scotland and none who don't. You get some Celtic fans who support the Republic, and I'm sure there are equally perverse Rangers fans out there. 'Tis the way of the world.'

Christ! Is it just me these people follow. I've had many a stooshie with England supporting Rangers fans (my brother being one) and with Republic supporting Celtic fans. By God you think Tebbit is bad with the cricket test you haven't seen me off on one.

iLL Man said...

Someone I know at work has Scottish mates who support the Republic. As I said, they're a perverse minority and the way things are going for Scotland (touch wood, no jinxing here), their glory hunting just looks even more risible.

Their 'political' reasons for supporting England or the Republic are of course just flags of convenience.

iLL Man said...

Someone I know at work has Scottish mates who support the Republic. As I said, they're a perverse minority and the way things are going for Scotland (touch wood, no jinxing here), their glory hunting just looks even more risible.

Their 'political' reasons for supporting England or the Republic are of course just flags of convenience.

marky said...

i didn't read your post yet but Led Zep rocks quite well on this. A good day.