Friday, April 06, 2007

Where's My Egg You Bastards?


Well, the sailors are home and the nation unites as one to say............. "Fuck off you traitorous cowards". That's if the BBC 'Have Your Say' board is anything to go by........ And it's probably not. The mind boggles at what the lunatic right have to say on the matter. No fan of the military, no lover of war, but these people are doing something that 99% of the jumped up little keyboard warriors(TM Flying Rodent) of this nation would run a mile from. Myself included. Ignorance, arrogance and bluster from people who either still think we're fighting the Jerries or who genuinely believe that life plays like an action movie.

Cunts!

Ok, on the subject of cunts, my employers handed out easter eggs to everyone in the company with the exception of my department. Why? Are we naughty children who don't deserve choccie treats? Ok, so I wasn't too bothered, most easter eggs are gruesome, but hells teeth, it pretty much tells you all you need to know about how you're valued within the company. I just contented myself with a bar of Bournville from the vending machine. Of course, they'll all get scoffed and the fucking moron that comes to fill our machine will take this as a sign that they can't be very popular and never stock them ever again.

FridayYouTubeNonsense.....



Ooh! Zeitgeisty.....

24 comments:

Anonymous said...

Beat me to it. I was going to post it on my blog.

Dance music not my bag but this has a snse of humour which makes it quite enjoyable. Hope i don't hear it on too many MP3 phones on the way to work.

Billy said...

BBC Have your Say pages: our equivalent of fascism surely.

Clairwil said...

IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT!

As a result of my research into the security services. I have attracted a number of stalkers.

However I am a very beautiful woman and resourceful with it. Men love me. The way we all loved Diana.

You should know that the Ill Man or Percival Fergus as he's known in real life is trying to sabotage me and my beautiful research.

Only this evening I received a picture of bare bottom. I believe it to be his. The name Percival was clearly seen on the right buttock!

I am a woman that makes her cuts wear tights for the sake of decency. You can only imagine how distressing the unveiled buttocks were to me. I haven't even seen my own!

Last week he sent me a picture of a woman turning an uncovered mattress.

You don't need me to tell you how terrified I am. Like Diana pursued by vile toads and snakes.

Anonymous said...

Clairwil is a beautiful lady. She doesn't look older than sixteen. Please refrain from displaying you buttocks at her.

SHE IS OUR DIANA AND YOU ARE KING OF THE SNAKES!!!!!!

You will not get away with this cheeky terrorism.

SHE HAS FRIENDS IN SPECIAL BRANCH.

Anonymous said...

LEAVE NEWTON ALONE!!!!

YOU AND YOUR PENSIVE NUDEY LADIES!!!!

Katy Newton said...

See how the Ill Man now resorts to posing as one of my fans on his blog to try and deny that he is stalking Clairwil like a weird loony stalker. It is vile and wrong.

And I don't want any more pictures of naked ladies either, Ill Man. I am too busy trying to hold down Clairwil's cats for her.

Anonymous said...

I am not Katy Newton or Clairwil and I don't know either of them but isn't it telling that Ill Man as good as admitted that he had stolen Katy's historic soup recipe?

Katy Newton is a beautiful, graceful lady who is just trying to finish her research and she doesn't need this sort of hassle.

Clairwil said...

He won't be happy till he's taken our soup, our research and our minds.

He is jealous of our beauty.

Clairwil said...

Yes I am a big fan of Clairwils. The Illman should cover his arse.

Anonymous said...

See! See! How the Illman tries to discredit me. He's making my comments look like they're from Clairwil.

The toad.

Katy Newton said...

Toad?

Or... shape-shifting lizard?

flyingrodent said...

Zeppelin are not "just a band".

They are the purest religion on Earth, and you should be flogged through the streets for allowing such blasphemy on your site.

Personally, I bow down at the altar of Jimmy Page twice a day in the knowledge that paradise awaits.

Nirvana, just a band?

Blood will run, motherfuckers. It's not big or clever.

Old Knudsen said...

The sailors are damned if they do and damned if they don't.

I understand why they did it but we're used to seeing bruised faces.

I have served and I know the pressure put on the individual to not mess things up for the rest, they did what was right though the HMS Cornwall didn't.

iLL Man said...

I've missed something here, haven't I? Anyone else fancy giving me some random abuse while we're here. Open season and all that......

Katy Newton said...

Dammit Ill Man an apology is in order. Clairwil's cats are tightless and it's all because of your elite toad squad.

What have you got to say for yourself? Well?

iLL Man said...

Ok, sorry. I think. Can someone fill me in on the finer points of this one? Only, I've spent the past 24 hours in the back of beyond and I'm just a little disorientated.

Clairwil said...

Pah. Don't be taken in. He's been cooking up his next plan.

Katy is a very beautiful lady. People often think she is only 16.

iLL Man said...

Rodent - Had he mentioned Television or The Dead Kennedys I'd have agreed with you on that. As it was, it was only a couple of boy bands, so I feel he's on solid enough ground..... ;)

Katy Newton said...

Someone asked Clairwil if she was excited about her 12th birthday the other day. People often think that Clairwil is very young-looking, until they read her erudite research.

iLL Man said...

Katy, how did you know about my 'Elite Toad Squad'? Who has betrayed me?

I will be avenged!!

Katy Newton said...

Ha! A confession at last. My Special Branch sources will see you hunted down like a... like a... like an elite toad!

Incidentally, I just posted a recipe for egg and lemon soup on my blog if you're still in the throes of soup addiction.

fofufou said...

They need to sell the Ferrero Roshay (as if I'm going to spell that at this time in the evening) as its about to go off. Therefore the popular stuff is slowly removed. A sad fact of vending machine life.

You are the first person to use my blog's proper title in a link. Rather than pat yourself on the back, have a wank at work to make yourself feel better.

Good day to you fine sir.

iLL Man said...

Thanks Lord M. I believe in using the given name of a blog in any links I hand out. If I had decided to call this blog "Quincy Jones & His Harmonising Ringpiece Orchestra", I'd damn well expect people to refer to the blog as such in their sidebars.

Re: Vending Machines. It's not just the Bournville. I can never locate a packet of Tomato Ketchup flavour crisps when i want them. Sometimes they don't even have Ready Salted.......

Cheese flavor? Beef & Onion? Grilled Turd and Piss vapour? Why sure, isn't that what the hungry office worker truly craves?

Sorry Milky, you got me started....

fofufou said...

No need to apologise, I am with you on this one. I like the T-Bone Steak Roysters (30p - the cheapest), but due to their overwhelming popularity they have been removed. The cheese Doritos aren't selling and will be past their sell by date soon.

The best thing to do is bulk buy when you see something you like and stash it for later dates.

Ah, office life...